Do You Have A Reason To Run Or Just A Season?

Have you reached the grounds as part of a corporate initiative or to meet more people and have fun? Is your agenda just to network, build relationships, pick those T Shirts and caps, click photographs and glam up facebook albums? Is the whole Marathon or Walkathon to hit kilometres in a specific time frame just a self absorbed, self bloating engine? Or is it just fashion?

I walk approximately five kilometres every morning and some evenings do twenty rounds in my corridor. So my neighbor probably thought I was the perfect person to join her daughter for a Walkathon that was scheduled on 15th November from Kanteerva Stadium sponsored and presented by Lifestyle - A Landmark Group Initiative.

Before I agreed or asked any question regarding the event – How many kilometers, what time, starting point etc I wanted to know if the event was supporting any cause. The link that was shared for registration said “Beat Diabetes” I was on for the Walkathon.

Late in the evening that day, my mother told my nephew in Kolkata that I had walked a few kilometers that morning with a few hundred people to beat diabetes. I am not sure if that registered in his mind immediately.

My nephew is a juvenile diabetic, since he was thirteen years old – He had regular dozes of insulin for a few years and is now on medicines with a dozen restrictions. His recent tests, done almost the same time the Walkathon was held, reflected sugar level on the higher side again. Inspite of repeated requests we could never get him to have Walking in his exercise regime, which is highly recommended for diabetic patients. He would always promise that he will walk and then as usual - human inertia.

My nephew could not ignore this simple gesture I made for the cause. Again, I am not sure, if it is to beat his own sugar level or to respect my effort or thank me, since a week, he is walking for an hour every morning, my sister confirmed.

It is really not about record you create or break, it is the meaning you bring along that counts.You really have to save your energy to be able to run a full marathon. More than that, Diabetes or Dementia – does not matter, save the cause.

About the Author:

Kakuli Nag is a Learning Consultant with 18 years of corporate experience in Sales, Training and Consulting. An avid blogger in multiple forums. advocatingoutcomes@blogspot.com

Cash or Kind?

Honestly, I was clueless.

The response I got from one of the orphanages actually caught me off guard. I innocently wanted to know if it is okay to get gifts for kids when I visit them. I was told in detail about the condition of the school’s infrastructure and they were pretty direct about seeking cash donations only. I suddenly felt small and helpless – the tiny wish I had to spend time with kids seemed remote. They did not refuse however they voiced repeatedly that they had a tight schedule. OK I got the message. I just experienced being let down, not invited, unwanted and surplus. Why was I doing all this in the first place?

I spoke to another orphanage expecting them to be different. This time I deliberately ignored the gift part and just stated that I wanted to visit them. The founder was busy and suggested we meet his wife. Although he was pretty much polite and warm over phone compared to the other gentleman I spoke to, I was a little apprehensive and still had that lingering feeling of a cold response.

My friend who was supposed to join me was the co founder of an NGO that runs a program where they encourage people to celebrate their birthdays with orphans. I was not at all aware of the program but as my birthday was just few days away, she was all excited about the perfect timing.

We spoke to the founder Mr. Thomas for an hour or so – the history of 37 years old Familia. This really was not a conventional home, it was based on commune building with foster parents. A man with so much devotion, commitment and zeal, who proudly showed his children’s photographs, happily married and some of them who contribute to this mission that continued his legacy for close to four decades uninterrupted. For most part I remained a silent observer, which I usually am, with a nod here and a smile there.

It is only and only when I saw the whole place, through the eyes of Mamuni, an inmate there, walked through the acres - things began to change. The pride in her voice, the sense of belonging she had, the warmth in her touch when she posed with us for photographs, the way she coaxed us to enter one of the homes to meet the kids who were rehearsing a Tollywood number for the evening program, that twinkle in her eye when she told about her ambition to be a nurse because it was father’s dream (The Founder), the mention of the near by old age home where her grandmother died a couple of years back –As I heard her, the cold responses I received in the morning seemed to fade and a warm feeling return in its place.

The way she stretched her hands enthusiastically to indicate the vastness of the property in which a few buildings were homes for over 50 children, a few farms that were revenue generating models to run the homes apart from the foreign funds, a bakery in house that serves supply of bread for children and staff, plenty of trees, a few ponds full of fishes, an upcoming school, the plants and saplings her mother planted –The only thing evident during that tour was, the young girl was talking about HER HOME.

So Cash or Kind? Of course Cash when you know it is in safe hands, well utilized. It is not always about income tax benefit when you donate. It is a connect deep down. Sponsor a day’s Lunch donating five thousand or just give chocolates and pens on special ocassions, the Mamunis there with their small and big dreams will make you want to do more, as they appreciate your time and gestures so very much! You feel tall and good inside – And transformed within.


Author Profile

Anindita Basu is associated with one of the leading companies in the steel industry. She loves travelling and is aiming towards entrepreneurship in near future.

DADA Series (Dignified Ageing and Dementia Awareness) Courtesy: Sanchita Chakraborty

DO’S AND DON’TS OF COMMUNICATION

DO

Talk to the person in a tone that conveys respect and dignity.

Keep your explanations short. Use clear and flexible language.

Maintain eye contact by positioning yourself at the person’s eye level.

Look directly at the person and ensure that you have their attention before you speak. Always begin by identifying yourself and explain what it is you propose to do.

Use visual cues whenever possible.

Be realistic in expectations.

Observe and attempt to interpret the person’s non verbal communication.

Paraphrase and use a calm and reassuring tone.

Speak slowly and say individual words clearly. Use strategies to reduce the effects of hearing impairment.

Encourage talk about things that they are familiar with.

Use touch if appropriate.

DON’T

Talk to the person in ‘baby talk’ or as if you are talking to a child.

Use complicated words or phrases and long sentences.

Glare at, or “eyeball” the person you are talking to.

Begin a task without explaining who you are or what you are about to do.

Talk to the person without eye contact, such as while rummaging in a drawer to select clothing.

Try and compete with a distracting environment.

Provoke a catastrophic reaction through unrealistic expectations or by asking the person to do more than one task at a time.

Disregard your own non verbal communication.

Disregard talk that may seem to be “rambling”.

Shout or talk too fast.

Interrupt unless it cannot be helped.

Attempt to touch or invade their personal space if they are showing signs of fear or aggression.


CARING FOR THE CAREGIVER

As a caregiver, you must learn to nurture your own needs. Here are a few recommendations to help you cope with the demanding role of being a caregiver:

Look for support — many family caregivers withdraw from family and friends because they feel no one understands. It is very helpful and in many cases, therapeutic, for you to join a support group where you can learn from others through sharing your experiences.

Let go of guilt — Let go of the “guilt trip” by realizing a need to temporarily set aside caregiving responsibilities for a period of respite.

Nurture the body — Be sure to get enough sleep and eat properly.

Take breaks from caregiving as often as possible by asking other family members to help.

Establish limits — Say no to requests that are beyond your capacity and say yes to offers of help from family and friends.

Author Profile:

Sanchita Chakraborti, a Minnesota Graduate with 14 years of Corporate Experience in various capacities in global sales, strategy and research functions, a fitness freak and a voracious reader.


References

The Dementia India Report 2010
Dementia Care: A Guide for Family Caregivers by Home Instead Senior Care

DADA Series (Dignified Ageing and Dementia Awareness) Courtesy: Sanchita Chakraborty

TOP TEN TIPS FOR DEALING WITH DEMENTIA SYMPTOMS

STOP!! Think about what you are about to do and consider the best way to do it.

PLAN AND EXPLAIN – Who you are; what you want to do; why you want to do it etc.

SMILE!! The person who takes their cue from you will mirror your relaxed and positive body language and tone of voice.

GO SLOW!! You have a lot to do and you are in a rush; but the person you are caring for isn’t. If the person is resistive or aggressive but is NOT causing harm to themselves or others, leave them alone. Give them time to settle down and approach them later.

GIVE THEM SPACE!! Any activity that involves invasion of personal space INCREASES THE RISK OF ASSAULT AND/OR AGGRESSION. Every time you provide care for a person you are invading their space.

STAND ASIDE!! Always provide care from the side not the front of the person, where you may be a target to hit, kick etc.

DISTRACT THEM!! Talk to the person about things they enjoyed in the past. Whilst you are providing care, allow them to hold a towel or something that will distract them.

KEEP IT QUIET!! Check noise level and reduce it when and where possible. Turn off the radio and TV etc.

DON’T ARGUE!! They are RIGHT and you are WRONG! The demented brain tells the person they can’t be wrong.

KNOW THE PERSON!! Orientate to their surroundings as necessary. If they become upset by this reality, validate and agree with their feelings.

MEANINGFUL ACTIVITIES

For an individual with dementia a meaningful activity is anything that fills time with a purpose and keeps them occupied. Being occupied and feeling included are two of the main psychological needs of people with dementia. Examples of meaningful activities include:

1. Sorting laundry
2. Going for a walk
3. Reading the newspaper or looking at pictures in magazines
4. Potting plants or bulbs or watering plants

Cooking in safety may be valuable and will make the person with dementia feel they are contributing to the daily tasks in the house. Setting tables, clearing up, washing and drying dishes are all familiar activities.

Music as a therapy has been well documented in dementia care.

Activities should be about pleasure and success, not stretching or challenging the person.

Activities should complement lifetime habits so it is important to be familiar with the likes and dislikes of the person with dementia. Things that gave the person pleasure and made them laugh before the dementia will still do so later on.


References

1. The Dementia India Report 2010
2. Dementia Care: A Guide for Family Caregivers by Home Instead Senior Care

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Author Profile:

Sanchita Chakraborti, a Minnesota Graduate with 14 years of Corporate Experience in various capacities in global sales, strategy and research functions, a fitness freak and a voracious reader.

DADA Series (Dignified Ageing and Dementia Awareness) Courtesy: Sanchita Chakraborty

WHAT IS DEMENTIA?

The World Health Organization (WHO) describes dementia as: “…a syndrome due to disease of the brain, usually of a chronic or progressive nature, of which there is impairment of multiple higher cortical functions…”

What this definition means is that the following functions may be affected in a person with dementia:

Memory – This is where a person may become forgetful of things such as names or recent events. The person’s short-term memory is usually affected leading them to forget recent events.

Orientation – A person with dementia may become lost even in a familiar environment.

Comprehension – The person may have difficulty understanding what it is you are trying to explain to them or what you are asking of them.

Emotions – Very low stress levels can occur in someone with dementia and they may therefore overreact to seemingly ordinary situations. A person with dementia may misinterpret a situation and become easily upset or agitated.

Judgment – A culmination of some or all of the above can result in poor judgment regarding others or themselves.

India is a diverse country with geographical and socio-cultural differences. We have a rapidly aging population, which currently exceeds more than a 100 million people. This number will steadily increase in the coming decades. Age related disabling conditions like dementia would increase and have a wider impact depending on the socio-cultural context.

It is estimated that over 3.7 million people were affected by dementia in our country in 2010. This is expected to double by 2030. Despite the magnitude, there is gross ignorance; neglect and services are scarce for people with dementia and their families. We know that dementia is not part of aging and it is caused by a variety of diseases. We now have a range of options to treat the symptoms of dementia and offer practical help to those affected. The challenge posed by dementia as a health and social issue is of a scale we can no longer ignore.

CHALLENGING BEHAVIOUR

People with dementia exhibit the following behaviors:

1. Restlessness
2. Aggression
3. Agitation
4. Wandering
5. Shadowing
6. Anxiety
7. Depressed mood
8. Hallucinations
9. Delusions

Caregivers are encouraged to view dementia as a disability that can be compensated for by positive approaches. People with dementia continue to function at an emotional level and will pick up on another person’s feelings (particularly if they are stressed or upset or annoyed) via body language, tone of voice and facial expression.

References

1. The Dementia India Report 2010
2. Dementia Care: A Guide for Family Caregivers by Home Instead Senior Care

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Author Profile:

Sanchita Chakraborti, a Minnesota Graduate with 14 years of Corporate Experience in various capacities in global sales, strategy and research functions, a fitness freak and a voracious reader.

A piece of you!

It is not a smart thing to do – to refuse money or pretend that you are way above real cash.

They all have the best of intentions when they try to assist our NGO with a contact that will fund our projects. In July, a relative wanted me to join her in Nagpur so that she could introduce me to important people who will be keen to sponsor. Another well-wisher, even before asking our NGO’s name, shared a name at C-level to support fund raising. When asked, why he wants to assist our NGO, one of the reasons were that he works with a political party and contributes to people like me who take responsibility of helping society. “People like me?”

At this stage, we want volunteers to own our projects, people to drive social entrepreneurship, support our initiatives, echo for us, be our ambassadors - more WITH TIME, than WITH MONEY. We focus on the “being” part of Human Being, so the labels cannot influence our journey. Just be good to do good, it works.

We need people with high integrity, character ethics and not just someone driven by superficial personality mirage. We need youth with sensitivity, whose inward journey has begun, aspiring global citizens.

We can always prepare a call script to outsource fund raising activity and have a dozen strangers do it mechanically without any sense of ownership to impact lives. As of now, we need personal ownership, not postman service – a piece of you! It is not about a maddening pursuit for money.

Will YOU write the next blog for us?
Will YOU call that sponsor and talk about what we do?
Will YOU stand in the stall with us to sell a painting by a spastic child or a handicraft to support a home?
Will YOU spend your birthday in an orphanage?
Will YOU make an effort to learn more about us?

Regardless of how much you nurture a plant, it has a time frame to bear fruits. There is no short cut to that. Try to assist a chicken that is trying to break free from the shell by an external force, to make it easy for the chicken, in all probability it will die. We draw our strengths from our struggle to change people’s mindset, thought patterns, way of life, sensitivities and sensibilities – The Shell. Money can wait. We are one and a half years old NGO and we really want to behave like one.

Next time someone remarks on world poverty with a self-sufficient mentality, “Our country has not reported any deaths due to hunger” we have a task in hand – change frame of reference! We do not need money to do that. Do we?


About the Author

Kakuli Nag is a Leaning Consultant for project needs analysis with BECKON model that advocates for outcomes. 18 years of corporate experience in Sales, Learning and Marketing. An avid writer in multiple forums.

Which phase are you in?

A man is said to pass through different stages in his lifetime. Dr. Wayne W. Dyer categorizes them as athlete stage, warrior stage, statesperson stage and spirit stage. Abdul Kalam believes even nations go through these transitions and called the last two stages as Big Brother and Self realization stages respectively.

Athlete stage is that energetic pursuit of performance and achievement

Warrior stage is that goal setting, pride of achievements and finding ways to demonstrate superiority

In the big brother stage, with a somewhat tamed ego, focus shifts to what is also important to others and societies – still achievers but not so inclined or obsessed to prove strength or superiority.

Self-realization stage is where humans matter, not families or nations alone, and certainly not self.

There are many senior people all around us who are very well established and highly successful, their children well settled, however even after their retirement, they still could not get past that demonstrating superiority stage. Initially their subject of discussion revolves around their own materialistic achievements - the villa, the cars, the foreign trips, the club memberships, the high profile job, then it is their children’s achievement – the foreign degree, their villas, their cars and their high paid jobs or medical profession or whatever, finally the subject is their grand children who is a ranker in school, great dancer, swimmer, athlete etc. It is not parental pride; it is plain and simple bloated ego! The Warrior Stage!

At times even if there is a will, it is always not possible to adopt an orphan child, or sponsor a senior’s treatment or child’s education every month – one can at least begin by being sensitive enough not to flaunt their achievements in front of people who do not have the means. Instead, they could share their struggles with them, their humble beginnings before their success in a manner, not to stamp their personal ego but in way others can relate and be inspired to enhance their quality of life. Is this anything less of giving? Someone’s life is getting impacted positively because of the life you lived; the success you tasted and the ready willingness you have to assist another achieve the same.

That is one of RSF’s core themes – Human Life Cycle Care that runs on the belief that any small or large scale social impact cannot be limited to a dozen institution’s responsibility alone, it has to be an individual choice. The next time you raise your maid’s pay or tip the waiter, be generous. The big brother stage is not about what you have gathered for yourself but what and how much, you have learnt to give.

If you are done with the first two stages and want to do something meaningful, feel free to contact us as we have several projects to be taken up by people with that intent. Twenty or Sixty, regardless of the age, the only criterion is you should be really done with the first two stages.

References:

Ignited Minds – APJ Abdul Kalam

For more details or to support our projects, contact ramosara.foundation@gmail.com